Second Guessing

Warning: This blog post will be chaotic and unorganized.

There's only one thing in this life that sets My tail feathers on fire.... to be made to second guess Myself.  

I don't mind constructive criticism.  We all grow from that.  Alright, well of course I mind it, I am a bit prideful... but I can take it and work with it just fine.   Those who don't know Me or who don't approve of My methods and styles I simply don't care about their opinion enough that it would even give Me pause to doubt.  

When, however, I'm told that I don't do enough to remind someone of their place in My life... when I'm truly being called 'too soft' My tail feathers surely do burn My skin and I begin to question....

I have said a thousand times I do things differently than most.  I'm strict and stern yet loving and fun.... I can play a game of uno with you and still maintain control... I don't live the Pro-Domme life nor do I reside in a porno.   If you want Divine Bitches... I can give you the site address. 

I'm sensual, romantic, caring, thoughtful, and I enjoy to see My slave happy and content... why?  Because when My slave is happy and content they are more apt to enjoy serving and want to do it more....I don't want someone to serve Me because they fear Me... though I do expect a level of respectful fear to indeed be there. 

During scenes, playtimes, etc... I will not hesitate to be a bitch.  I will push when I know it's safe to push... and I've learned in life that when someone 'says' they are ready and when they are truly ready are two entirely different times.   But during the day to day, the mundane... I expect that the rules, extensive rules I might add, the schedule, the control, and the power exchange are what remind one of their place... not Me being a bitch or unloving.

Today however... I question that.  Perhaps I am too soft.  Perhaps I love too much.  My personality, My way of life... maybe they aren't cut out for this?  Maybe that's the answer to the question all along.  No one stays because I'm not cutthroat enough.... 

Treating people like they are valuable treasures seems to get Me nothing more than them feeling like kinky friends.... I guess it's time to reevaluate what I want... who I am... and why I'm here.